For every personality test that I’ve ever taken, I’ve been labeled as the romantic type.
For a long time, I’ve seen being “a romantic” and romanticizing your life in a not-so-positive light.
It meant that I’ll be the person who either falls in love way too quickly or rejects someone after the first date because I found a tiny flaw.
I relate to every Taylor Swift song, watch all the RomComs, and definitely feel like Disney movies have set my standards exceedingly high.
And as a romantic person, my autopilot is thinking about and dreaming about the future.
But that doesn’t lend itself super well to being grounded on this earth. And I’ve found that when you get so caught up in daydreaming and lusting after lifestyles that are glamourized, the reality is never as perfect as you hype it up in your mind to be.
So, instead of fixating on romanticizing the future, I think this trend of romanticizing your life right now is the healthier version – because why wait to enjoy the heck out of life?
Focus on the life you’re already living and how you can make the most of every moment – even if being romantic for you means spending time alone.
Here’s how you can begin romanticizing your life:
1. Take things slow
Soak everything in. Savor it. Allowing more romance into your everyday life means taking your time. It means being present, and not rushing the small moments. The small moments are the big moments.
Get up 10 minutes earlier, so that you can truly savor your cup of coffee. Allow yourself to eat breakfast in bed. Go the long way home. Take a walk without any destination in mind.
2. Be fully immersed
While most of us are in a hurry to get to the next thing, you’re paying attention. You’re tapping into emotions; you’re feeling and experiencing every little aspect.
A lot of us are afraid to be fully present and immersed in life because life can be pretty freaking painful. So we all have our habitual escape mechanisms. But I think the real beauty in this world is the holistic view of it all. The fact that we all get up and keep going in a world that can be so cruel is truly inspiring.
Allow yourself to feel the full spectrum of emotions; love deeply; be in the moment.
3. Set the mood
Light your candles, wear the fancy clothes for no occasion, buy the flowers, roll the windows down and blast your favorite Spotify playlist. Go make the perfect picnic spread.
Don’t wait for special moments in order to live your best life. Don’t wait until you have a partner to create romantic date nights.
Set the mood for a romantic night alone, if you know what I mean. You don’t have to wait to be romanced by someone else; do it for the person you live with every single day of your life – YOU. Do this, even if you’re in a relationship.
4. Be the main character
Aren’t the romantic types often the dreamers of the world? But what I find about myself is that I often get so swept up in watching other people living my dream that I forget to be the main character in the story. Romanticizing your life means living out your dreams – not just dreaming about them. Make the moves, step into your potential and actually start taking action.
Nobody wants to watch a plotless movie. Every movie has drama, but they also almost always have a happy ending – so just remember that when you’re in the thick of a painful season.
5. Set goals and release them
We’re all about vision-aligned goal-setting here, which means – yes, set goals for yourself, have a vision for your life. But also, remember that it’s about the journey and not the destination. So create goals that you can live out day-to-day and take action on, create the vision board on Pinterest, but release the expectation and the grip you have on achieving goals outside of your control.
Release the pressure to prove, and instead set intentions that allow you to work toward the vision you have for your life while knowing that life might take you in new directions.
6. Allow your imperfections to be perfect
Authenticity has become such a buzzword, but sometimes we’re not even sure what being ourselves looks like – especially if we’re used to trying to meet everyone else’s expectations.
Allow yourself to fully express yourself, and to be comfortable with your imperfections. We all have them. And it’s time for you to get comfortable with them – even if you start by doing this alone in your home.
Part of why we’re so obsessed with romanticizing everyone else’s lives instead of our own is because we don’t feel good or worthy enough. Make it a practice to dance wildly alone, to sing at the top of your lungs, to say affirmations in the mirror, to journal it out, to look at yourself undressed – and really make an effort to see yourself and love yourself for exactly who you are.
Learning to love yourself is a lifelong process, but it starts with making an intentional effort to see yourself with compassion and gentleness. We’re all just figuring it out. You are not your past. You are a work in progress – and you are deserving of love.
