Hiiii, welcome! I used to be the president of the “I’ll be happy once X happens” club!!

In this article, we’re going to cover how to stop putting off your happiness until you cross the next finish line, so you can start living (& enjoying) your life now instead of later. 

Sound like a plan?

Being achievement-oriented has gotten a bad rap in the personal development world over the last couple of years.

As we start critically examining the patriarchy and how it’s shaped our everyday lives, working, doing, and hustling are demonized.

Our culture tends to look at things through an all-or-nothing lens. So while there’s been a more significant focus on slowness, mindful living, and being (instead of doing), it’s also made people think that hustling or achieving is no bueno.

That’s not exactly true.

The point isn’t that you should give up your dreams, never set a goal again, and commit to being a couch potato, because GOD FORBID you work hard on something.

It’s about untangling achievements with your identity and sense of self. Because for a lot of us, achievement became less about what we do and more about who we are.

What you accomplish isn’t meant to define you. 

What it IS supposed to do, is give you healthy goals to strive for because you like them, it’s an enjoyable way to spend your time, and achieving them is an added bonus.

If you feel exhausted by your goals and what it takes to achieve them, it’s time to examine your relationship with achievement.

Things to consider:

1. Why do you want what you want?

I’ll give you a hint — the only reason we do or don’t do anything comes back to emotions.

For example, if you want to hit 10k followers on Instagram, have 100k in your bank account, or quit your full-time job, your desire has little to do with achieving those things, and everything to do with how you think achieving those things will make you feel.

So the better question is, how do you want to feel? 

Another consideration: what do you feel currently that you no longer want to feel?

If you crave safety and security by having 100k in your savings account, you most likely feel the opposite way now — maybe looking at your finances makes you feel unsafe, unsupported, or ungrounded.

An enlightening starting place is to identify how you feel, what you hope the next box checked will help you feel instead, and what you think prevents you from feeling that way now.

Another thing to get honest about: do you want this for you? Or because you want to manipulate how others see you?

Many people have a subconscious belief that achievement is what gains respect, love, admiration, and belonging (and that we aren’t good enough as-is).

We become invested in having what we want so that others will perceive us in a certain way.

Our egos love that, because it thinks we’re creating a buffer around rejection and disappointment — in reality, it’s not true.

Think about your goals and the things you want to achieve. Let’s say you are guaranteed to get what you want, but there’s a catch – you’d never be able to tell anyone about it. Not a soul. Ever.

Would you still want it? Would it still be important to you if it was all grind and no glory?

2. Circumstances won’t change how you feel

Is it easier to be happy when you have the house of your dreams, a doting and loving partner, money in the bank, and a snatched body?

Do those circumstances naturally produce better feelings than living in a cramped apartment with a roommate you hate because they never put their dishes away, going on your 7th failed hinge date this month, an empty bank account, and unwanted chin hairs? 

Maybe.

But what’s also true is that your brain has consistent beliefs about the world.

If your subconscious belief is “the next [goal I hit] will FINALLY make me feel [the emotion I want],” you will carry that with you everywhere. 

If you change your circumstances without changing your beliefs, your feelings won’t change either.

They might temporarily, but when the high of getting what you want wears off, it’s back to “well.. what’s next?”

It’s why people who thought getting rich and famous was the key to everything get what they want and still feel lonely.

It’s why women can lose 40 pounds and have their dream body, but still don’t feel good enough.

The only way to have the feelings you want later is to create them now (I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules!).

What’s ONE thing you can do today to create your desired feeling? If you want to feel safe with money, what’s an action you can start and complete today to make that happen?

Is it transferring $5 to savings? Is it opening a high-yield savings account? Is it keeping $100 in cash in your wallet?

Maybe it’s not about money, and you want to feel safe by snuggling up on the couch with your favorite blanket and watching your favorite show for the 100th time.

The feeling of safety is the same no matter how you trigger it, so whatever makes you feel safe, do it! 

And at the risk of you wanting to slap me through the screen, my best advice is…

3. Fall in love with the process

I KNOW it’s cliche, but it’s a cliche for a reason. 

(Warning: tough love reality check incoming)

If you keep happiness locked away in the next box you check, you will spend 95% of your time hating where you are and 5% riding the high of whatever achievement you hit.

And that’s how you’ll spend your life until one day you wake up and realize you spent all of your life waiting to live instead of actually living.

Yikes, right?

I spent 25 of my years living that way. I’m so thankful I’ve changed my perspective, but I also kick myself for letting my ego call the shots for that long.

Today is all we have. So get out there and do something with your time that makes you feel alive.

You don’t have to stop dreaming, and you don’t have to stop achieving. But stop making that all you do.

Make the process as fun as the goal, so that when you finish, it’s just the cherry on top. Because you know that you lived, learned, and had a ton of fun along the way. Because that’s what it’s all about, anyway!

That doesn’t mean the journey is always easy — toxic positivity is never the goal.

It only means you stay present and commit to making the process as good (and hopefully better!) than the outcome.

It was yet another trendy buzzword bandwagon that I wasn’t keen to jump on — I blame it on being an Enneagram 4.

But one day, it hit me like a freight train, and I thought “Oooooooh…. THIS is what people mean when they talk about reparenting! I get it!”

My big ah-ha! moment is what I’m going to share with you now –  what reparenting is, why you might want to explore it in the first place, and a couple of tangible practices to get you started!

Okay so — what is reparenting, anyway?

The short answer is that reparenting is providing yourself with the emotional support that you lacked as a child from your caregivers.

For the long and juicy answer, we have to start at the source: parenting styles.

A movement that’s growing in recent years is conscious parenting. This parenting style focuses on teaching children how to learn and grow as individuals rather than obeying adults, following rules, and behaving. 

Parenting has shifted to teaching children how to identify, feel, and regulate emotions instead of invalidating them.

Disclaimer: I’m not a parent, but these are my observations of the parenting world.

As a society, we are finally discussing mental health openly. We now recognize that unhealed trauma can cause harmful behavioral patterns, which can unconsciously be passed down from parents to children through multiple generations *generational trauma has entered the chat.*

Unfortunately, emotional intelligence and conscious parenting styles weren’t mainstream in the ’80s and ’90s, so millennials didn’t typically experience this type of parenting from our caregivers *womp womp*

I don’t know about you, but my emotional experience was frequently invalidated — as a sensitive person I was often labeled “too much” or “dramatic.”

I learned that my emotions made people uncomfortable and that they were problems that needed to be solved. As a result, I didn’t learn how to effectively validate or regulate my emotional experiences.

This became a breeding ground for low-self esteem, negative self-talk, and severe nervous system dysregulation. 

The relationships you form with your caregivers and interactions with them deeply influence how you develop. Maybe you had an over-critical parent that harshly ridiculed you when you got a C in math class, made unhelpful observations about your appearance or weight, or was emotionally cold towards you when you were upset and needed comforting.

Humans are observational learners. The behaviors we see others engage in are often the ones we adopt for ourselves.

If your caregivers were critical of you, that likely became how you talk to yourself.

If your caregivers didn’t model how to soothe and support you, you didn’t learn how to soothe and support yourself.

Reparenting is the process of teaching yourself that as an adult. It’s giving yourself everything you needed as a child but didn’t get.

How to reparent yourself

Step 1. Identify what you need  

You might not know your needs if you’re not used to comforting yourself. Meeting your needs is a muscle you build over time, so if it feels confusing right now, that’s okay. Here are some ideas for how to gain insight:

Look to the past 

Think back to a specific moment in childhood when you felt you weren’t adequately supported; what did you need instead?

Maybe your mom forgot about your dance recital and never said sorry, you got accused of lying about breaking a vase when you didn’t, or you fought with your sibling, and your parents took their side instead of yours.

What would you do if you could go back in time and play the role of your caregiver(s) in that specific moment?

How would you talk to yourself? What did you need to hear? How would you have wanted them to respond to make you feel better?  

Look in the present 

You can also think about situations that have happened recently. Maybe you got passed over for a promotion at work, a long-term client in your business decided not to resign, or you fought with your partner about dishes (again).

If you were venting to your best friend, how would you want them to show up for you? What would you wish they would say? 

You can also flip it — If any of those things happened to your best friend and they were venting to you, what would you tell them? 

Thinking about how you would like others to show up for you, or how you would naturally show up for others in a similar position, can bring a lot of ideas of how you can show up for yourself.

Knowing your love language and how you prefer to give and receive love can also show you how to meet your emotional needs.

2. Bring awareness to your self-talk

How do you respond when you have big feelings? What are your thoughts and feelings about the emotional experience you’re having?

Do you allow your emotions, or do you tell yourself that you shouldn’t have them? 

When you make a mistake, do you kick yourself, think about how stupid you were, and overthink what you’d change if you could go back in time?

These are perfect opportunities to practice reparenting. Instead of playing the role of the overly critical parent, decide how YOU want to talk to yourself at that moment.

What would feel good? What would feel like you’re being wrapped up in a warm hug?

For me, a thought I like to practice is “It’s okay that you feel this way,” or even “Of course you feel this way; this is a sucky situation.” Before I go into problem-solving mode or resolution, I make sure my inner child knows she’s safe. She’s not only allowed to have big emotions but they’re welcomed.

Decide intentionally (and in advance) how you want to support yourself through tough or big emotions and what you can do to build trust with yourself.

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Reparenting can feel awkward and clunky at first, just like any new skill. Be patient and stick with it! Over time, you will be able to easily calm your own nervous system, speak kindly to yourself, and build self-trust. When you have your own back (no matter what) and can depend on yourself to carry you through the hard stuff, life feels more manageable. 

I serve women entrepreneurs, coaches, course creators, consultants, and women-owned agencies across various industries in the online space by creating the swoon-worthy, efficient business systems and processes of their dreams.

Long story short, with the help of my internal team and their team of contractors and employees, I manage their internal and external operations so that they can get back to doing what they love in their zone of genius.

I absolutely live my best life when I’m working behind the scenes in my clients’ business operations, systems, and funnels.

My mission is to help my clients optimize and restore their business operations foundation without wasting time and money.

My approach to completing projects is centered around lean fundamentals and the overall goal to keep things streamlined from A to Z while cutting out wasted steps so that everything that is happening, is adding value to the process.

My clients typically come to me looking for help streamlining their business operations or to help clean up, fix, audit, and automate the processes that once served them but now after they have scaled their business, no longer serve them.

In this period of time, they have rapidly grown their business and their team and aren’t in the position to pause what they have going on now to troubleshoot and repair what is happening behind the scenes. The cost of halting their operations to fix it is much greater and that’s where I step in.

I got started in the online space in September of 2020 and began my entrepreneurial journey as a virtual assistant.

Over the course of the last near 3 years, I’ve expanded my business and transitioned into and out of various roles: from a virtual assistant to an online business manager, a launch manager, a funnel specialist, an operations manager, and now a COO and integrator (or an operations and integration specialist).

While it may seem like hopping around from one role to the next, it was actually a quick but smooth period of growth from mastering one focus to wanting to learn and develop skills in other areas that complimented each other.

From my first day until now, I’ve truly leaned into allowing the flow guide me in finding where I’m truly aligned, and I’m happy to say that I feel more aligned in what I do each day. 

After finishing college with a bachelor’s degree in finance and a master’s degree in business administration in 2019, the moment I found this world and the possibilities that came with it, I knew that I was in the right place.

Now, 4 years later I’ve grown from being a solo part-time entrepreneur (while still full-time in the corporate world) to running a business full-time at home, bringing my husband on the team full-time, and recently hiring our first contractor to start expanding the business in more ways. It’s been a rollercoaster of success and failures but the most rewarding journey.

The beauty of the entrepreneurial world is that you’re allowed to make those shifts, operate a life-first business, and redefine success for yourself. The moment I let go of the corporate world and the stress that came with it was the first time I felt space and ease and found it possible to actually enjoy what I do for a living. We only live once, so why not do it while chasing what you love in a way that feels good to you? 

My days look completely different every single day, week, month and so on, but I try to follow the same approach to prepare myself for what can happen so that I can keep myself in a flow state in order to resolve issues and provide the transformation that my clients come to me for.

A Day In The Life Of A COO and Online Business Owner

Morning Focus & Routine

Depending on the day, I typically hit the ground running between 4:30AM and 6AM CST. In order to prepare me energetically for the day and get me in the right mindset, I make sure I have time to fully wake up, get ready, drink water, and pour myself a cup of coffee. 

What I’ve found out is that the first hour or two of my day truly determines how that day goes. If I wake up and immediately jump on my computer and induce a sense of rush and stress, then I’m going to be stuck in that pattern all day and usually end up working into the late night. (I’ve learned this over the years through trial and error.)

So, the way that I set myself up for a busy day with multiple clients and communication with team members is allowing myself time in the morning to ease into waking up, take my time getting ready, get some fuel and water into my system, and ease into my day. Approaching the day in that relaxed state ramps up my productivity level and I’m usually able to end the day early in the afternoon, depending on what projects we have going on.

In order to achieve that, sometimes that means waking up earlier than I want to but it’s the ultimate reward of having my work days be centered around productive energy especially when I’m working on projects and tasks that require more intensive focus and troubleshooting. In my case, it’s not usually a problem to wake up early for that extra time since I go to bed around 9PM. (Insert your old grandma jokes here!)

Day Planning & Prioritization

The second most important piece in determining my productivity is the first 30 minutes to one hour of my work day. Each day I take time to focus on what is going to be priority for the day by looking at my call schedule first and then determining what time I have left to accomplish tasks. That time outside of calls is what gauges my capacity and what I can truly get done during the day. 

Typically Mondays are a heavy call day and I only have a few hours in the afternoon for productivity so in knowing that I make sure to prioritize the heavier lifting of work throughout the rest of the week. Otherwise, I make sure that after assessing time capacity, I’m focusing on what is a priority for each client.

I usually outline 3-5 priority focuses or tasks for each of my clients and make my way down the list based on turnaround priority across the board. This helps me stay balanced and working on each client while accomplishing what is to be completed that day or week. 

I’ve found that by approaching my workload this way, I’m able to keep that balance longer versus only working on one client for an extended period of time. If I’m chipping away at the higher priority, the ease of flow increases over the week’s time.

I not only approach each day this way, but I do this once at the beginning of the week as an overview planning session and then I “re-do” it each morning to account for any changes that have happened.

Workflow, Client Calls, & Communication

From there, I’m able to get in the zone, stay heads down and focus on the things that need to get done externally for my clients and internally for my own business. In the mix of “doing-the-things”, I’m usually communicating back and forth with my clients and team over Slack.

While this can cause interruptions during the day, I consider that time productive because I’m in the moment with my clients and team. The most important thing you could do as an online business owner is prioritize communication while keeping your work hour boundaries of course.

The more I’m in constant and necessary communication with my clients and team, the more trust, comfort, and cohesiveness are formed. Creating this environment with clients and team members not only benefits your relationship with them but it keeps you in a forward motion and rhythm of focusing on what is important NOW versus what is just on the list for the week.

While the actual “things” I do during the day are usually never the same, the way I show up is and that is what is my individual priority. Maintaining a flow that keeps me showing up and performing for clients, my team, and myself. 

Daily Recap & Reprioritization

After a long work day, I revisit my task and priority list that I made at the beginning of the day and do a quick de-brief session that usually only takes a few minutes. I look for areas I accomplished, areas I made progress in, and areas that I didn’t get to touch. This will help me in the planning phase during the next day because I’ll know what is most priority so that I can keep things moving.

What Matters & Why You Should Focus On Your Flow

Being an entrepreneur who manages multiple clients and teams across the world, and different industries and zones of genius, the one thing that keeps me going and thriving in what I do, is my flow state.

Focusing on my flow and my energy every day is what has allowed me to grow, shift, triple my yearly income, expand my team, develop new skills and so much more. If you allow yourself to prioritize how things feel first, then you’ll know where you need to apply your skills second. 

Shift your mindset from what your role is or what tasks to do, to how you show up best. If you’re focusing on just getting things done, things won’t feel rewarding or like you’re making an impact. Focus on how you operate best and you’ll start operating even better. While keeping that mindset, it’s important to also let yourself be guided into new areas and lean into the uncomfortable. Of course, there isn’t a “physical” movement to actually feel but once you start opening up your days to what actually matters and where things feel right, you’ll start allowing that to flow back into your world.

The problem is that you are using goal-setting techniques that aren’t effective for you and then blame yourself when they fail.

It’s like trying to cut wood with a rusty, dull axe and then blaming your skills when it doesn’t work. In this blog post, I will teach you why your metaphorical goal-setting axe isn’t working, and I’ll share my all-time favorite (albeit a little unconventional) goal-setting technique!

Here are the reasons what you’re doing is missing the mark:

Reason #1: Arbitrary timelines

People often unconsciously use goals as a means to control and predict outcomes. Translation: you’re using goals as a way to cope with the uncertainty of life and to pressure certain things to happen within arbitrary timelines.

If you’re striving to lose 20 pounds in six months, does it really matter if it takes eight? Or 12? Or is the timeline a way to manage feeling uncomfortable when you look in the mirror?

Do you really need to be a millionaire by thirty-five, or is it a way for you to feel safe with money because you don’t right now? 

When goals are set this way, they become more of an escape plan than a helpful guidepost.

What would it look like if you completely let go of a timeline? I know, goals without timelines might seem taboo.

Traditional goal-setting advice recommends using SMART goals, which are specific, measurable, actionable, realistic, and time-bound. There’s nothing wrong with that approach and some people love them, but if you’re reading this article, I’m guessing that method hasn’t worked for you.

Getting too specific, too measurable, and too time-oriented can create rigidity. This causes you to feel suffocated by your goal instead of inspired by it, leading to disappointment if you don’t meet it perfectly.

Reason #2: Types of goals you’re setting

You can set two types of goals: process goals and outcome goals. A process goal is deciding to go to the gym three days per week. An outcome goal is setting a specific number of pounds you want to lose or an amount of weight you want to squat.

A money-related process goal is to put money in your savings account every time you get paid. An outcome goal would be to have an extra $5,000 in your bank account by the end of the year.

Theoretically, if you hit your process goal, you will likely achieve your outcome goal. So if you focus on outcome goals but neglect process goals, you fixate on what you want rather than what it takes to get there.

Reason #3: Assuming what is necessary

Let’s say you want to quit your job and go full-time in your online business. You might have a list of things or actions you need to take to make that dream a reality. Let’s say you need to create a website, post regularly on social media, advertise, get more clients, save a certain amount of money, etc.

How many things on that list will move the needle forward? What is genuinely necessary vs. what you think is necessary based on your perceptions or what others tell you?

If you enjoy the process, you are 83.6% more likely to reach your goals if you enjoy what you’re doing (yes, I made that statistic up). But think about it – do you want to hit a goal by muscling through things you wish you didn’t have to do or by doing what you enjoy? What do you think is going to be easier to stick with and will be more likely to produce the results you want? 

If you brain dump a list of what you think is necessary to achieve your goals, look down, and think, “YEAH, NO, I don’t feel like doing that,” get creative! What else could you do to achieve your goal that doesn’t include those things? Ask yourself what would be FUN!

There’s more than one way to get to 9. You can add 8+1, subtract 11-2, and multiply 3*3; few of many options. Where are you telling yourself the only way to get to 9 is 6+3? Find your flavor of how you want to get there.

Note: If no ideas you come up with sound fun, re-assess the goal. For example, if you want to run a marathon but every physical conditioning exercise you think of sounds awful, running a marathon might not be the best goal for you. If you are going to hate every moment of the process for a few brief moments of accomplishment, what’s the point?

My favorite (unconventional) goal-setting technique

As someone who often set goals I didn’t achieve, I knew I had to devise a better way. This approach releases timelines, creates opportunities for fun and flexibility, and focuses on outcomes through processes.

Step 1. Decide what area(s) of your life you want to set goals in.

Many of my clients’ goals boil down to improving relationships, finances, health, careers, or overall happiness. If you struggle with consistency and maintaining your habits, I’d recommend starting with just one goal and then working from there.

What area of your life would you most like to improve? What feels the most important to address first?

Step 2. Choose your goal

This approach differs from SMART goals because your goal can be vague. In fact, it should be! Let’s take health, for example. Your goal could be “improve health.” It could be “improve body image,” or “get stronger,” or “clear up my skin.” Whatever feels good for you!

Step 3. Formulate your goals into a question

Whatever you have identified in step 2, plug it into the question, “what’s something fun I could do today to support _________?”

• What’s something fun I could do today to support my health?
• What’s something fun I could do today to support my body image?
• What’s something fun I could do today to support my strength?
• What’s something fun I could do today to support my skin?

Whatever your question is, answer it! Brain dump everything you could do that would feel fun and would support your goal. If it feels fun but doesn’t support the goal, it’s out. If it supports the goal but doesn’t feel fun, it’s definitely out. Now, you have a list to work from.

Ask yourself this question daily, choose something off your list, and do it. It could be fun to do the same thing every day (or if you’re like me) you might get bored quickly and switch it up often. It doesn’t matter! As long as you’re supporting your goal and having fun.

That’s it :) Rinse and repeat!

Another option: ditch goals altogether

If this method doesn’t pique your interest or the information in this post didn’t spur any new ideas, consider taking a break from setting goals, period. *Gasp.* While goals help guide you in your pursuits, they are not the only way to be successful.

When we think of someone who doesn’t have goals, it’s usually with a negative connotation – *cue the image of someone unemployed, ripping bongs, and eating Oreos on the couch all day.* But the belief that you need goals to be successful is just that – a belief. Which means you can choose a new belief. Goal setting is a tool that should be used to help you, but it’s not a code of conduct to live by. If it doesn’t feel helpful for you in this season, drop it all together (without guilt!).

Instead, focus on living. Breathing. Being. Spend time on things that you enjoy and make you happy. When you follow that energy, achieving your goals becomes a natural byproduct instead of something you are pushing and forcing.

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Happy goal setting!

In this article, we’ll explore specific blogging tips for each Enneagram type, empowering you to create compelling and effective content that resonates with your target audience. Whether you’re a perfectionist, helper, achiever, individualist, investigator, loyalist, enthusiast, challenger, or peacemaker, there’s a blogging tip just for you.

Type 1 – The Perfectionist: Done Over Perfect and Give Us Structure

If you are a perfectionist, you might struggle with publishing blog posts that are not perfect. However, it’s important to remember that perfectionism can hinder progress. Try to focus on creating high-quality content that resonates with your audience, but don’t get too caught up in the details.

You value accuracy and thoroughness. When blogging for your business, focus on providing actionable advice and well-structured content. Break down complex topics into clear steps, and include practical tips and guidelines.

Use headings, bullet points, and subheadings to organize your content, ensuring it is easy to navigate and digest. This approach appeals to your desire for order and delivers valuable information to your readers.

Type 2 – The Helper: Engage with Your Audience and Encourage Convos

As a helper, you enjoy supporting others and providing value. Use your natural empathy and understanding to create blog posts that address your audience’s pain points and needs. Share your knowledge and expertise to help others grow and succeed.

You thrive on building connections and assisting others. Use your blog as a platform to engage with your audience. Encourage comments, questions, and feedback, and make an effort to respond promptly.

Incorporate storytelling and personal anecdotes to create a warm and relatable tone. By fostering a sense of community through your blog, you strengthen relationships with your readers and cultivate a loyal following.

Type 3 – The Achiever: Showcase Success Stories and Expertise

As an achiever, you are driven to succeed and make an impact. Use your ambition to create blog posts that showcase your expertise and highlight your accomplishments. Share your success stories and tips for achieving goals to inspire and motivate your readers.

You are driven by accomplishments and recognition. Showcase tangible results in your blog posts. Share testimonials, case studies, or client success stories to demonstrate the impact of your products or services. Incorporate visuals, such as before-and-after images or infographics, to reinforce the effectiveness of your offerings.

This approach appeals to your desire for achievement and attracts potential customers who value proven outcomes.

Type 4 – The Individualist: Infuse Your Blog with Authenticity and Creativity

As an individualist, you have a unique perspective and creative flair. Use your creativity to create blog posts that stand out and capture your audience’s attention. Share your personal experiences and insights to connect with your readers on a deeper level.

You possess a unique perspective and a desire for self-expression. Infuse your blog with authenticity and creativity by sharing personal insights and experiences.

Use storytelling to convey emotions and captivate your audience. Experiment with different writing styles, incorporate visual elements, and embrace your artistic nature. By bringing your authentic self to your blog, you attract readers who appreciate your individuality and resonate with your brand’s authenticity.

Type 5 – The Investigator: Deep Dive into Topics and Provide In-Depth Analysis

As the investigator type, you enjoy researching and analyzing information. Use your analytical skills to create blog posts that provide valuable insights and data-driven solutions. Share your research and findings to establish yourself as an authority in your field.

You have a thirst for knowledge and intellectual exploration. Leverage your expertise and analytical skills by offering in-depth analysis and deep dives into your blog topics. Conduct thorough research, provide comprehensive explanations, and include references to credible sources.

Share your insights, theories, and discoveries to establish yourself as a trusted authority in your industry. This approach appeals to your desire for understanding and attracts intellectually curious readers.

Type 6 – The Loyalist: Address Concerns and Provide Solutions

As a loyalist, you value trust and reliability. Use your commitment to create blog posts that provide practical advice and actionable steps. Share your proven strategies and tips for success to build trust with your readers.

You possess a strong sense of loyalty and a focus on security. Use your blog to address common concerns and provide reassurance to your audience.

Write informative and reassuring content that helps alleviate fears or doubts. Offer practical solutions, tips, or step-by-step guides that address potential challenges. By providing valuable information and building trust, you establish yourself as a reliable resource in your field.

Type 7 – The Enthusiast: Add Positivity and Inspiration into Your Blog

As an enthusiast, you enjoy exploring new ideas and experiences. Use your curiosity to create blog posts that are engaging and informative. Share your enthusiasm and passion for your topic to inspire your readers to take action.

You are naturally optimistic and enthusiastic. Infuse your blog with positivity, inspiration, and a sense of adventure. Share success stories, motivational quotes, or uplifting content that sparks curiosity and excitement. Incorporate visuals, such as vibrant images or videos, to enhance engagement.

By offering an optimistic and inspiring perspective, you capture the attention of readers who seek fresh ideas and a sense of possibility.

Type 8 – The Challenger: Share Your Hot Takes and Thought Leadership

As a challenger, you are confident and assertive. Use your strength and conviction to create blog posts that challenge the status quo and provide thought-provoking insights. Share your bold ideas and opinions to inspire your readers to think differently.

You embody strength and assertiveness. Use your blog as a platform to share bold opinions and establish yourself as a thought leader in your industry. Write thought-provoking content that challenges the status quo, offers innovative perspectives, or discusses industry trends. Back your arguments with evidence and invite healthy debates.

This approach appeals to your desire for authority and attracts readers who value bold and authoritative voices.

Type 9 – The Peacemaker: Encourage Harmony and Collaboration through Your Blog

As a peacemaker, you value harmony and balance. Use your diplomacy to create blog posts that provide a balanced perspective and promote understanding. Share your insights and tips for resolving conflicts to help your readers find common ground.

You value peace and unity. Use your blog to promote harmony and collaboration within your industry or niche. Write content that fosters understanding, highlights diverse perspectives, and encourages dialogue.

Seek opportunities to collaborate with other bloggers or experts, and feature their insights or guest posts on your blog. By fostering a sense of inclusivity and cooperation, you create a welcoming space for readers and position yourself as a unifying force.

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Blogging is a powerful tool for business growth, and tailoring your approach based on your Enneagram type can enhance your effectiveness and connection with your audience. Whether you’re providing actionable content, engaging with readers, showcasing success stories, infusing authenticity and creativity, or addressing concerns, embrace the unique strengths and motivations of your type.

Remember to adapt these tips to suit your specific business goals and target audience, and watch your blog become a game-changer in your holistic marketing strategy.

“Your goals are the fuel that propels you forward in life.” – Ed Mylett

“Your job is to feel good and be ready to receive the things you are wanting. And when you are ready to receive it, it will come.” – Esther Hicks

“Don’t let small minds convince you that your dreams are too big.” – Anonymous

“Manifestation is an act of trust. It is the belief that what you desire is already yours.” – Gala Darling

“If you want to fly, you have to give up the things that weigh you down.” – Oprah Winfrey

“Power is not given to you. You have to take it.” – Beyoncé

“Success is not in what you have, but who you are.” – Bo Bennett

“The key to manifesting your desires is to focus on the feeling of already having it.” – Esther Hicks

“The minute you learn to love yourself, you won’t want to be anyone else.” – Rihanna

“The path to achieving your goals may not always be smooth, but every challenge you encounter is an opportunity to grow and become stronger.” -Marie Forleo

“You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated. In fact, it may be necessary to encounter the defeats, so you can know who you are, what you can rise from, how you can still come out of it.” – Maya Angelou

“I don’t want to be famous for being famous. I want to be famous for making a difference.” – Lady Gaga

“You have to be fearless and take risks. Have the courage to fail. It’s not the end of the world if you do.” – Charlize Theron

“The most common way people give up their power is by thinking they don’t have any.” – Alice Walker

“The question isn’t who’s going to let me; it’s who’s going to stop me.” – Ayn Rand

“I never dreamed about success. I worked for it.” – Estée Lauder

“Manifestation is a co-creation between you and the universe. Trust the process and surrender to the magic.” – Gala Darling

“You are a powerful creator. Use your thoughts and energy wisely to manifest the life you desire.” – Esther Hicks

“Your goals should be a reflection of your innermost desires and values. When you align your goals with your true self, the journey becomes more fulfilling and meaningful.” -Lewis Howes

“Success isn’t about how much money you make; it’s about the difference you make in people’s lives.” – Michelle Obama

“Manifestation begins with a clear intention and unwavering belief in the possibilities.” – Gala Darling

“Success is not the absence of failure; it’s the persistence through failure.” – Aisha Tyler

“The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt

“Dream big, work hard, stay focused, and surround yourself with good people.” – Anonymous

“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.” – C.S. Lewis

“Success is not a destination; it’s a journey of continuous improvement.” – Tony Robbins

“The only thing standing between you and your goal is the story you keep telling yourself.” – Jordan Belfort

“Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle.” – Christian D. Larson

“The distance between your dreams and reality is called action.” – Anonymous

“Success is the sum of small efforts repeated day in and day out.” – Robert Collier

“Don’t be afraid to give up the good and go for the great.” – John D. Rockefeller

“It’s okay to want more, to want to be ambitious, to want to be successful. You don’t have to apologize for that.” – Shonda Rhimes

“You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” – C.S. Lewis

“The best way to predict the future is to create it.” – Peter Drucker

“Dreams don’t work unless you do.” – John C. Maxwell

“The only thing standing between you and your goal is the story you keep telling yourself as to why you can’t achieve it.” – The Wolf of Wall Street

“It’s not who I am underneath, but what I do that defines me.” – Batman Begins

“Success is not for the chosen few, but for the few who choose.” – Anonymous

“Don’t let the fear of the unknown keep you from taking bold steps toward your goals. The greatest opportunities lie on the other side of fear.” -Marie Forleo

“The road to success is always under construction.” – Lily Tomlin

“Don’t let anyone define you. You define yourself. Set your own goals and follow your own path.” – Miley Cyrus

“You are capable of more than you know. Choose a goal that seems right for you and strive to be the best, however hard the path.” – E.O. Wilson

“Don’t wait for the opportunity, create it.” – Anonymous

“The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt

“The harder you work for something, the greater you’ll feel when you achieve it.” – Anonymous

“The only person you should try to be better than is the person you were yesterday.” – Anonymous

“Success is not about luck; it’s about hard work, persistence, and learning from failure.” – Ed Mylett

“You are never going to feel like it. Start before you’re ready, and your motivation will catch up with you.” – Mel Robbins

“When you visualize, then you materialize.” – Esther Hicks

“You have the power to manifest your dreams into reality. Believe in the magic of your desires.” – Gala Darling

“Don’t be afraid to fail. Be afraid not to try.” – Michael Jordan

“The more you believe in your own ability to succeed, the more likely it is that you will.” – Shawn Achor

“Your goals are the road maps that guide you and show you what is possible for your life.” – Les Brown

“The universe responds to your vibrations. So, make sure your thoughts and feelings are in alignment with your desires.” – Esther Hicks

“The key to building something extraordinary lies in setting clear goals and staying committed to them, even when the path gets tough.” – Guy Raz

“Manifestation is about aligning your thoughts, emotions, and actions with what you want to create in your life.” – Gala Darling

“If you want to achieve greatness, stop asking for permission.” – Eddie Harris Jr.

“Dream big, work hard, stay focused, and surround yourself with good people.” – Anonymous

“The only way to do great work is to love what you do.” – Steve Jobs

“Goals are not achieved by mere intentions; they require deliberate and disciplined action every day.” – Ryan Holiday

“The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams.” – Eleanor Roosevelt

“Success is not the absence of failure; it’s the persistence through failure.” – Aisha Tyler

“The only limit to our realization of tomorrow will be our doubts of today.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt

“Manifesting is not about wishing for something and waiting for it to magically appear. It’s about consciously co-creating your reality through intention, visualization, and inspired action.” – Unknown

“You are never too young or too old to set goals and chase your dreams.” – Tony Robbins

“Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle.” – Christian D. Larson

“The secret to getting ahead is getting started.” – Mark Twain

“Success is not in what you have, but who you are.” – Bo Bennett

“The only limits in our life are those we impose on ourselves.” – Bob Proctor

“Your dreams are on the other side of your fears.” – Jenna Kutcher

“Your goals should be a reflection of your values and what truly matters to you. When you align your goals with your priorities, you’ll have a greater sense of fulfillment.” – Chalene Johnson

“Setting goals is the first step in turning the invisible into the visible.” – Lewis Howes, The School of Greatness Podcast

“The power to change your life lies in the simplest of steps.” – Mel Robbins

“Don’t ever let somebody tell you you can’t do something. You got a dream, you gotta protect it. When people can’t do something themselves, they’re gonna tell you that you can’t do it. You want something, go get it. Period.” – “The Pursuit of Happyness”

“When you set a goal, the universe conspires to help you achieve it.” – Jay Shetty, On Purpose Podcast

“Success is not the key to happiness. Happiness is the key to success. If you love what you are doing, you will be successful.” – Jenna Kutcher, Goal Digger Podcast

“Don’t be afraid to dream big. Your goals should scare you a little and excite you a lot.” – Marie Forleo, The Marie Forleo Podcast

“Dreams are not heavy. We make them so by the sheer density of our lack of attention.” – Julia Cameron, The Artist’s Way

“Your goals should be a reflection of your true desires, not what you think others expect from you.” – Ed Mylett, The Ed Mylett Show

“Setbacks are simply opportunities in disguise. They allow us to reevaluate our goals, adjust our strategies, and come back stronger than ever.” -Lewis Howes

“You can’t just sit there and wait for life to come to you. You have to go get it.” – “Gilmore Girls”

“Ambition is the first step to success. The second step is action.” – Unknown

“Ambition is not a dirty word. It’s believing in yourself and your abilities to achieve greatness.” – Unknown

“The greater the ambition, the greater the achievement.” – Unknown

“Ambition is the fire that fuels our desires and propels us towards our goals.” – Unknown

“You can waste your lives drawing lines. Or you can live your life crossing them.” – Shonda Rhimes / 79?

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it’s the courage to continue that counts.” – The Darkest Hour

“Don’t be afraid of hard work and setting ambitious goals. That’s the path to greatness.” – Sara Blakely

“Don’t be afraid to give up the good to go for the great.” – John D. Rockefeller

“Goals allow you to control the direction of change in your favor.” – Brian Tracy

“Setting audacious goals and embracing failure as a stepping stone are the hallmarks of successful entrepreneurs.” – Guy Raz

“Don’t just set goals, create a vision for your life. Goals without vision are just a to-do list.” – Chalene Johnson

“The more goals you set for yourself, the more reasons you’ll have to become successful.” – Jay-Z

“Never lose sight of your dreams. They are the compass that guides you through the journey of self-discovery and creative fulfillment.” – Julia Cameron, The Artist’s Way

“Set your goals, follow your dreams, listen to your heart, and don’t let anything stand in your way.” – Brandy Norwood

“Follow your dreams, even if it means standing alone.” – Taylor Swift

“The life you have led doesn’t need to be the only life you have.” – Anna Quindlen

“You don’t have to wait to be chosen or recognized, you can choose yourself. Set your goals, take action, and make it happen.” – Ryan Holiday

What if I told you that you could actually create 10+ pins from one piece of content? It’s something that I do for Life Goals and my Pinterest Management clients to get them attention on Pinterest, even when they don’t have hundreds of blogs to work with.

On Pinterest, you should ideally post multiple times a day and with that, you’ll need content to schedule with. We use Tailwind for scheduling to make this as easy as possible (get a free month and ghostwriter credits with our referral.)

Pinterest, as a visual search engine, rewards fresh and unique content. Rather than simply promoting your blog post with the same visuals, it’s important to approach it from different angles. While keeping consistent fonts and branding, vary the imagery to appeal to different audiences.

To create compelling pins, you can leverage various platforms for Pin template options. My go-to places are:

• Canva
• Creative Market
• Etsy
• Collaborate with designers for unique-to-you pin designs

In this blog post, we’ll explore the concept of upcycling your content on Pinterest and provide you with a step-by-step guide on how to create 10 pins from a single blog post.

Alright, let’s use an example to illustrate how you’d break this down.

Transforming a Wedding Photographer Blog Post into 10 Pins:

Let’s use a blog post titled “10 Secrets To Having A Memorable ‘First Look’ For Your Wedding” as an example.

1. Seven Pins Using Different Pin Templates

Experiment with different headlines, call-to-actions, and keywords for each pin. This allows you to present different aspects of the blog post, catering to diverse interests and search queries.

For example, you could say:

• “10 Ways To Make Your First Look Extra Special”
• “The Best 10 Ways To Have A Dreamy First Look As Bride And Groom”
• “Make Them Gasp: 10 Secrets for a Show-Stopping ‘First Look’ on Your Big Day”
• “Make it Unforgettable: 10 Secrets to a Heartwarming and Emotional ‘First Look'”
• “10 Secrets to a Picture-Perfect ‘First Look’ on Your Wedding Day”
• “10 Tips for a Memorable ‘First Look’ that Reflects Your Love Story”

This gives you opportunities to A/B test with different styles and headlines to see what works best. And you can use ChatGPT to create new headline ideas for you, to save even more time!

Include 1-3 of these variations in your blog post to incentivize people to share it themselves! See below for my example of this.

2. Two Pins Highlighting Key Points

Create two pins that list five of the ten tips discussed in the blog post.

Alternatively, select a share-worthy quote or tip and design a pin around it to entice users to click and explore further.

Consider these options a way to get more saves. These pins won’t drive as many clickthroughs, because you’re giving the information away in the post. Be sure to add a call-to-action to encourage them to head to your website.

These are still super useful because they tend to get the most saves and can help you get a boost of engagement which helps your Pinterest account grow.

3. One Carousel Style Post or Video

Craft a Pin carousel that showcases all ten tips from the article, dedicating each slide to a different tip with details from the blog post. This engaging format allows users to swipe through and discover valuable information.

Bonus Options for More Content:

If you’re looking to take your Pinterest game to the next level, consider these additional content creation ideas:

Convert your blog post into a video. Incorporate relevant imagery from your photoshoots and link back to the blog post, encouraging users to learn more.

You can then repurpose that content across other social media platforms like Instagram Reels to expand your reach. Share snippets, tips, or statistics from the post and direct your audience to Pinterest for the full details.

With these strategies in place, you can transform a single blog post into a bunch of viral-worthy pins that attract your ideal audience, drive traffic to your website, and ultimately get you more leads and sales in your business.

Remember, the magic lies in repurposing your content in creative and visually appealing ways. By taking advantage of Pinterest’s platform features, you can make your content go further and reach a wider audience.

If you’re looking for more guidance or personalized assistance with Pinterest management and strategy, don’t hesitate to reach out. Let’s chat and unlock the full potential of your Pinterest marketing efforts!

It feels a little meta to say this, but pin this for later :

There are five reasons you might look at your life and think “I should feel happier — what gives?”

1. You aren’t honest about what you truly want

Is the life you have the one you genuinely want? Or does society tell you that you should want it? For example, society tells us we should chase money, success, status, and power. And if you’re a woman, we’re told we should chase relationships, families and motherhood, and a house in the suburbs.

Consider these questions: did you build your life by following your intuition and desires? Or did you build your life by doing what you thought you should do? In a perfect world, what would your life look like? Does it look like the life you have now, or something different?

If your answer is “I don’t know,” that’s okay. But check in with yourself to see if “I don’t know” is your knee-jerk reaction because you do know what you want and you’re afraid of disrupting your current life to go after it.

Other times, this question is difficult to answer because we’ve been doing what we should do for so long, our true desires become muffled. It’s kind of like if you stop going to the gym, your muscles shrink over time. If you don’t often tune into your desires, you get out of practice.

Can you remember a time where you desired something and followed the spark? What did that feel like? Once you’ve identified that feeling, start looking for things that make you feel that way!

2. You don’t prioritize pleasure and joy

Is making time to enjoy your life the last thing on your to-do list every day? If so, you’re not alone. It’s so easy to get caught up in the demands of life that taking time for yourself gets pushed to the back burner.

What activities make you feel excited to be alive? Maybe it’s reading romance novels, going on long walks, or dancing to your favorite songs. Whatever activities you love, start building them into your daily routine just like you would pencil in cleaning your toilets or going grocery shopping. Having fun is just as important (if not more) than your have-to-do’s.

Joy isn’t something that’s “nice to have,” it’s a necessity for a happy and fulfilled life. Don’t be afraid to prioritize it through rest, hobbies, traveling, or anything else that you get enjoyment from.

3. You’re overly focused on what you don’t have

It’s a tale as old as time – the grass is greener on the other side. It’s a lot easier for us to put off our happiness by thinking it’s something we can achieve later than it is to commit to creating happiness for ourselves now.

Perfectionism is a contributing factor to this because many of us subconsciously believe that happiness is attained when we have arrived at our dream life. That’s a sneaky way to say “I will be happy once things are perfect.” This leads us to hyper-focusing on the things that are missing from our lives.

What would it look like if you started to appreciate the things that you have right now? What’s the last thing that made you feel genuine appreciation and gratitude? How did that emotion feel in your body? What are things in your current reality that make you feel that same way?

When you identify what naturally elicits appreciation and gratitude, it makes it easier to go out of your way to notice those feelings when they’re happening. Over time, your brain will gravitate towards this instead of focusing on lack. No gratitude journaling required!

4. You subconsciously choose safety over growth

The brain’s job is to keep you safe and alive. And while that’s helpful because you can’t live your best life if you’re dead, safety is often in direct opposition with you crushing your goals.

Most things in life that are worthwhile doing require some sort of emotional risk. To your primal, safety-loving brain, that is the equivalent of diving straight into a shark feeding frenzy.

When in reality, you’re being put on the spot as you interview for your dream job, turning your candle-making hobby into a business, or challenging yourself to work out and eat healthier.

Your brain will give you excuses like “this isn’t the right time for this,” or “this won’t work,” to keep you away from that emotional exposure or discomfort. If you don’t intentionally question and shift those thoughts, you will make decisions that support safety, not growth.

Sure, maybe you’ll fail and it won’t work. 

 If you don’t like a thought your brain is giving you, meaning it makes you feel like crap or it stops you from doing what you truly want, question it and choose a new thought.

What else could be true? Could everything work out in your favor? Is it possible things could be challenging but you’ll still put in the work and reach your dream? Could you  “fail” but get directed to something even better?

Those are possible outcomes, too. Our brains usually like to project our fears and convince us our worst-case scenarios are what will most likely happen – don’t let it!

5. Your inner critic steals the show

Most women I’ve worked with in my life coaching practice have shameful or critical self-talk. This typically stems from having a parent that was critical or shamed you for making mistakes.  

It can also stem from the voice of society, as women are often criticized no matter what they do. For example, if you wear make-up you’re trying too hard but if you don’t, you’re letting yourself go. Or if you are career-oriented you’re cold, but if you prioritize a romantic relationship you’re settling.

For my clients this shows up in everyday life as second-guessing their decisions, not allowing themselves to make mistakes, and setting impossibly high standards and shaming themselves when they don’t meet them.

It doesn’t matter what you have achieved or accomplished in your life, if your inner critic is in the driver’s seat, it makes you feel like nothing you do is good enough. It’s also a huge energy suck!

If your life doesn’t feel good, don’t panic! It doesn’t mean that there’s something wrong. It’s simply a sign that something is misaligned and needs attention. Tapping into your desires (and following them!), prioritizing joy, focusing on the good things you have, choosing growth opportunities, and creating kinder self-talk can all help you live your best life.

While I think it’s totally okay to do and eat whatever the heck you want while traveling, sometimes making an effort to do a few things for your self-betterment. Just because you’re on vacation mode, doesn’t mean you can’t add in some healthy things without depriving yourself of the local fun!

I feel so much better when I have a little me-time or some version of a routine in place, and make a couple of healthy choices while enjoying a new adventure. Like everything, it’s a balance!

So if you’re looking to add some self-care to your summer travels, we’ve got you covered on everything from your packing list to your plane ride to when you are enjoying your destination.

Here’s a list of self-care activities you can add to your travel itinerary:

1. Pack a comfortable pillow or neck support for the plane or long car rides.
2. Bring your favorite book or download an audiobook to enjoy during your travels.
3. Bring a journal to write about your experiences.
4. Take time to stretch and do some light yoga or exercise.
5. Wear comfortable and breathable clothing. And pack comfortable shoes!
6. Stay hydrated by bringing a refillable water bottle.
7. Use SPF to protect your skin from the sun.
8. Wear a hat or sunglasses to protect your face and eyes.
9. Take breaks and rest when you need to.
10. Bring your own snacks to keep you fueled and satisfied.
11. Practice deep breathing or meditation to help reduce stress and anxiety.
12. Listen to calming music or your comfort podcasts.
13. Use noise-canceling headphones to block out unwanted noise.
14. Take a warm bath or shower to relax after a long day of travel.
15. Use a sleep mask or earplugs to help you sleep better.
16. Take a break from technology and enjoy the scenery around you.
17. Take a nap if you need to catch up on sleep.
18. Practice good hygiene by washing your hands regularly and carrying hand sanitizer.
19. Take a morning hot girl walk to get coffee, or plan a hike to explore your destination.
20. Treat yourself to a massage or spa treatment.
21. Visit a local farmer’s market or grocery store to buy fresh and healthy food.
22. Stay connected with loved ones back home through video chat or social media.
23. Learn about the culture and history of your destination.
24. Take a cooking class to learn how to prepare local cuisine.
25. Use a travel pillow to make sleeping in unfamiliar beds more comfortable.
26. Pack a small first aid kit with essential items like bandaids and pain relievers.
27. Carry a small bag with you for day trips or excursions.
28. Take a break from alcohol or limit your intake.
29. Keep a positive attitude and remain flexible if things don’t go as planned.
30. Take a break from social media and enjoy the present moment.
31. Use aromatherapy to help you relax or sleep better.
32. Bring a reusable tote bag for shopping or carrying items.
33. Take a break from work and truly be OOO while you’re on vacation.
34. Get plenty of rest before and after your travels.
35. Keep a travel journal to document your experiences, or write it out on your Notes app.
36. Treat yourself to a special souvenir or gift. Bonus points if you collect something from all your destinations.
37. Take a dip in the pool or ocean to cool off.
38. Use a travel-friendly skincare routine to keep your skin looking healthy.
39. Practice gratitude and appreciate the opportunity to travel.
40. Take a day off from being on the go with sightseeing and relax by the pool or beach.
41. If you have it, take advantage of hotel amenities like fitness centers and spas.
42. Enjoy the journey and have fun!

Up next: Sometimes it’s not possible to totally log off while you’re traveling, so here’s a blog with workcation tips if you’re running a biz while traveling!

What will you takeaway from this self-care list for your next vacation?

To eliminate overwhelm, people swear by productivity hacks, prioritization strategies, and making big tasks bite-sized. Don’t get me wrong, these can all be helpful – but they will treat the symptom of overwhelm, not the root cause. Let’s talk about a few other ways you can manage your overwhelm so you’re rocking your life and it’s not rocking you.

1. First thing first: welcome your overwhelm

I know this sounds counterintuitive, but hear me out! Usually, when we feel overwhelmed we see it as a problem. And as humans, when we experience a problem, the first thing we do is rush to fix it. Or worse, we blame ourselves for having the problem in the first place.

What if just for a moment, your overwhelm wasn’t a problem? What if it’s just something you’re experiencing because it’s a thing that happens when you’re a human on this earth?

Nothing has gone wrong. Take a big, slow, deep breath in through your nose, and exhale out of your mouth like you’re trying to fog up a mirror. I’m serious – pause and do it!

How can you feel your overwhelm and just be with it without trying to fix it or eliminate it? What message is the overwhelm trying to tell you?

2. How often are you saying yes when you mean no?

There are times when we say yes to things we don’t want to do because we like our reasons for doing so. For example, you might say yes to your best friend’s bar crawl bachelorette party because you want to support her even though bars and drinking aren’t really your vibe. 

Saying yes when you want to say no gets tricky when the reason you’re doing it is because you feel like you “have to” to avoid disappointing or upsetting other people. That creates a big energy leak in your life and creates a fast track to resentment and burn out.

Time is the most precious and valuable resource that you have. If you viewed your time and energy like gold, would you still hand it out so freely? 

3. Intentionally fill your plate

Is your metaphorical life plate full of nourishing foods you love to eat, but you’ve realized there’s simply too much of it and there’s no way you can eat it all? Or is it full of foods you don’t like that you’re forcing yourself to choke down?

When you’re overwhelmed because too many great things are happening, that is different than being overwhelmed because you don’t like the majority of things you spend your time on.

Do you like the way your life is set up? If you look at an average day, do you like it? Would you want to live that day for the rest of your life? If not, it might be time to re-assess how you spend your time and if that honors what’s important to you.

4. Change your perspective about your to-do list

The funny thing about to-do lists is that they never truly end. It’s like a CVS receipt, that baby goes on for miles.

If you base your success on whether or not you complete the items on your to-do list or how close you are to the end of it, you will be chronically overwhelmed. The end of a to-do list is a moving target.

What if the goal shifts from getting things done to enjoying what you’re doing?

This can be done by creating more space in your day for rest or joy and/or making the blah, routine parts of life more fun. Have to clean the house? Listen to your favorite music or podcast. Need to workout? Go for a walk in the sun. Need to pay bills? Eat your favorite snack while doing it.

While not everything will always be fun, there are ways where you can infuse more of it into the things you’re already doing.

5. Speaking of rest…

Rest has become a buzzword in the personal development world with everyone and their cat preaching how vital rest is. I don’t disagree.

But what I see happen with rest is that people “rest” with the purpose of being rejuvenated so they can be more productive. It makes rest a means to an end instead of what it actually is – something you experience for the sake of experiencing it.

You can’t pour from an empty cup, but you don’t have to fill your cup just so you can empty it again. You can fill it up just because you want it to be full.

A note on resting when you’re overwhelmed or not used to rest – it can be really difficult to let yourself relax. As odd as it sounds, resting is a skill. So if it feels bad at first and you’re preoccupied with everything you need to get done, that’s okay. You’re not doing it wrong. Your brain may naturally wander, but stay committed and bring yourself back to the present moment.

6. Phone a friend

As a feminine-essenced being, you are a natural receiver. When you don’t ask for help because you feel like you “should” be able to handle it all or it makes you a burden to others, your inner feminine doesn’t feel nourished because she loves to receive with gratitude. Don’t shun that part of yourself because you don’t feel worthy of support.

If you were honest with yourself, what would feel incredible to delegate to another person? What would feel like a huge sigh of relief if you didn’t have to do it anymore? Think about who might be able to help you with that and go have a conversation with them! We can’t make it through life without support systems. Don’t be afraid to lean on yours.

–

Everyone feels overwhelmed by their to-do lists sometimes, and productivity and time management hacks can be really helpful. But if what you’re doing isn’t cutting it, it’s time to reflect on what your overwhelm is telling you about how you show up in your life and what (and who) you make yourself available for.